Quality, Not Quantity is the key to True Friendships

A person will have many types of friends over the course of their lives.

They fit into categories or stages that change, as you change and grow. Friends fill the need that we all have…to not be alone. To have someone to share good news and bad.

The friend we played with in the sandbox though, doesn’t have to be the same friend you run track with in Highschool.

The changes we go through, our experiences, and the dynamics of each of our family’s are not going to be the same.

Therefore our personalities, our likes and dislikes, our goals and values, won’t be carbon copies of each other. Your friendship needs will evolve.

You’ll have your siblings or cousins, who are usually the first friends you’ll have. This is where you learn the fine art of sharing, communication, and compromise. You’ll learn that it isn’t acceptable to hit your ‘friend’ over the head with your Barbie car, or biting the hand reaching for your favourite Tonka Dump truck, when they reach over to play with it. It doesn’t matter if you were already playing with something entirely different. Your toys are no longer just YOUR toys. You are told you have to share them. Because That is the polite and proper thing to do.

Then there are the school buddies. They kids you play with at recess, eat lunch with or walk back and forth to school with. Casual friends.

The friends that you hang with at school but not after.

Some of these people are your ‘smoking Pit’ buddies. The only thing you have in common is that you are all corralled into a small space on school property , that is barely big enough for all of you. You have to be friendly with a person when you’re crammed in like sardines….when some part of you is touching some part of them.

There’s the friend you have a class or two with. You sit beside them for every class, sharing pens, paper, or maybe homework. You joke about the teachers ‘comb-over’ and how it’s clearly not working.

The really lucky ones will have One Special friend, who you’ve known for years, or even decades, and that has walked alongside you from the very beginning of the friendship. The friend you can tell all your secrets to, and know they are safe. That friend, who, with all of life’s up and downs, will stand beside you, no questions asked. Even if you’re standing in the middle of a manure pile. That same friend who, even if they can’t tolerate the person you’re seeing, or dating, or marrying, will still stand beside you as your Maid-of-Honour, or Best Man and will be there to pick up the pieces of your broken heart if it doesn’t work out.

There are boundaries.

The romantic relationship that a friend may have, is none of your damn business. It shouldn’t have anything to do with the friendship between the two of you.

People have the right to chose. And to chose what they believe is right for them, even if its not what you had hoped for them. As a friend you can voice your opinion but you have no right to interfere.

As a friend, no matter what happens, you should just be there.

That is my definition of a True friend.

Another Year Under My Belt

Today…one more year passes, quicker than one of my posts, it seems.

I am coming up on my 5-year mark of Cancer-free(ness) this November, and all is well there.

The older I get though, the more my body revolts. The Fibromyalgia makes mornings almost unbearable until my medications take effect, and I can walk upright like an actual human being.

I have decided to try Yoga…I just need to physically start, but also need to mentally prepare.

I will do it at home and not in a class where I would more likely than not fall on my face. More preferable for sure to protect my pride. I have videos, and now that we have reliable, unlimited internet, I can YouTube till my heart’s content. Now it’s just a matter of doing it

Trying new things is scary, and I am more of a stick-to-what-I-know kinda person. I still eat like a teenager most of the time and could live on cereal and Kraft Dinner. (My cereal is Raisin Bran though). With Fibro, fiber is a must.

My Dad and ‘Mom’ stopped by yesterday and brought me the best card that had me laughing.

It made my day.

I received a text this morning from my step-son. Simple and to the point…..Happy Birthday! Perfect.

My 18 year old ‘baby’ posted on Facebook:

Then there’s Josh…..

My 1st born. The child that made me ‘grow up’ along with him. His loving tribute

The one and only who who post a pic of his Mother in her housecoat, looking 10 months pregnant. Flattering, right?

Good thing I love him, or I may have had to kill him…lol. His Birthday will have a surprise from me, his generous and loving Mother. Game On!

It’s the little things that make the biggest imprints on our soul. These are so important.

Kindness.

A gentle touch.

Loving concern.

Acknowledgment.

Understanding.

Pearls of wisdom for everyday life.

I am going to spend my day relaxing, crocheting, having a birthday dinner down the road at my in-laws, and spending time with my family.

Who could ask for more?

I am very blessed to have them all.

And Happy Fall everyone. My favourite season full of colour and cooler weather.

Have a wonderful day and Thanks for listening.

Nikki

Alone, but not Lonely

Today was the first time in a really long time, that I was the only person in the house during the day. The kids were at work,and their girlfriends were working or signing up for school.

I enjoy having them around. Most 18 and 22 year olds don’t spend a lot of time with their parents. They are out living their lives.

But we have been very fortunate in that regard. They are home-bodies, and don’t mind hanging with us ‘old’ people, watching movies, or playing on their phones.

So, It was me, and the menagerie. Four small dogs, one very large dog and a blind cat occupy the indoor spaces.

When I take them outside in the yard, another three to five outdoor cats come running for petting or playing.

But even with all the animals, I accomplished more today than I have in weeks. My pain levels and mood have been a huge factor in my lack of motivation. Who really feels like ‘creating’ or ‘designing’ when your mood is dark. Although with Halloween right around the corner….

Without stress or constant distraction, my Fibromyalgia was livable.

I even progressed quite a bit on the pattern I am writing for one of my winter hats. It is coming along nicely and should be finished tomorrow.

My crochet projects are comforting for me when they come together quickly and as they are supposed to. But rarely do they work up without a hitch. Your chosen stitch pattern just doesn’t look good, so you ‘frog’ it… rip it back and start again. Or you can lose count of those stitches when the doorbell rings and all your pets go crazy.

This can happen multiple times, and it’s good to be able to focus, so your mood doesn’t sour too quickly.

This is also the first year that we didn’t have the dreaded ‘Back to School’ shopping. All of my chicks have grown up, graduated and are now on to bigger and better things.

The time really has gone quickly. The day my each of my kids was born, is still as fresh in my mind as if it were yesterday.

When you’re in the thick of it, doing your best to teach this totally dependant bundle of crying, pooping, and awe inspiring miracle how to survive, each sleepless moment seems like an eternity. You wonder if you can do it. The responsibility is ginormous.

Then, one day you wake up and they’re grown. And you long for those early days. Another stage of life ends.

But maybe, just maybe, if you’re very lucky, you can use all that knowledge and patience on your grandkids… just not too soon.

%d bloggers like this: